Wednesday, January 06, 2010

Advice from the Psychological University of Life

I’m not a psychologist but I think sometimes how we act is a reflection of how we feel. I’ve been feeling pretty low for a few weeks due to uncertainty about future work commitments given the recession which is finally having an effect on me and my work. The Psychological University of Life has taught me (many times) to talk about such things rather than bottle them up. So the big question for me is; How come, as a real old man of 57, I can’t break a lifetime habit of brushing these worries under the carpet hoping they will resolve themselves, rather talking about them? The joy is that I have a wonderful wife who knows when things are not right with me and who says just the perfect things at the appropriate time to get to the nub of the matter. Thank you my darling Annie – I am indeed blessed.


Mark JF said...

Sorry to hear you're down in the dumps.

Personally I don't think bottling things up is necessarily bad nor is talking about them good. Neither approach resolves the underlying issue, it just copes with it temporarily. I think the best thing is - having recognised the problem - figure out a course of action. Talk to Annie, write it down, go out and act on it.

Meantime, this should cheer you up:

Trevor Gay said...

Hi Mark - thanks my friend – I appreciate your words. I have to say I have done exactly what you suggest (just proves great minds think alike I guess)

Annie and I have talked it all through and we have some plans. The plans are radical but they mean we can look at things positively. I’m no longer ‘in the dumps.’ The anxiety I had was internal. I think I hid it well for a few weeks but Annie, being the person she is, knew things were not right of course!

I love the Chuck Berry video – what a fantastic performer he was/is – I see from Wiki that Chuck is 83 years old and still touring!! Amazing!

J.KANNAN said...

Dear Trevor,

For a change I would like to begin my comment with quote...............

"Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery. And today? Today is a gift. That's why we call it the present." Ana make use of the present fully

A very good topic presented in crisp and spic way and I liked the way it is presented.

What's in ones mind is reflected on the face through thought process and for a good change why not start thinking that nothing is going to happen to me that can not be solved by me and who says, "YOU ARE OLD?"- In fact you are BOLD to be stronger and stronger-You are GOLD to shine and shine and that's how I view at 65. "am young and energetic bold and gold and not old.

Do not try to brush worries under the carpet instead burn and bury it for ever from your mind and close the entry gate of worry for ever. Trevor its a reality that Annies is "with you and in you" to take care and that's the reality of life as you feel "YOU ARE INDEED BLESSED.


May God continue to Bless & Grace you and your family with smile on your face and light on your life & Biz. MY special thanks goes to "Annie". Pl convey this to her.

With Regards.


Trevor Gay said...

Fantastic comments as always JK - you are sooooooooooo right of course. I wish I could change the habit of a lifetime when it comes to talking about anxieties earlier. Although as Mark says there are sometimes when it is best to keep these things within so as not to worry others unnecessarily.

I've passed on your comments to Annie as you asked - she is MORE than my rock!

Annie said...

Thanks JK for your words of wisdom - you are so gifted!
Poor Trevor has been worrying about finances for weeks but now we have worked out a practical solution. I heard this quote recently, "with pressure comes opportunity". There will some big changes in our lives soon - exciting eh?
Hope you are well.
God bless, Annie

J.KANNAN said...

Dear Annie/Trevor

Good Morning and Thank you very much for your fine words of appreciation and encouragement.

From now on Trevor is Rich and will always remain Rich because you are with him and 'and one of your best friends to both of you eager to see you both rich at all times.

If only worry can find solution for finance, I would have been above Bill Gates & warren Buffet- I don't worry for money- Worries can only add more problems and multiply to find solutions which is again a worry..........................And" Worry often gives a small thing a Big Shadow."

I am indeed happy to note that you have jointly worked out a practical solution and there's going to be changes in your life and my best wishes to you both

Yes I too have heard of this quote "With pressure comes opportunity"........................... and opportunity brings PLEASURE PLEASURE AND PLEASURE.

Have a Great and enjoyable week end.................... Minus Worry for ever from the life.

With abundance of Love & regards to you both.


Trevor Gay said...

Bless you JK - you are too kind.

Scott Peters said...


Over recent years, I've seen much change, and much change for the better. While I'm not fond of organized government and their ill attempts at saving us from ourselves, I've seen many people rise above the mud and become better human beings.

I've also remained alive during a time that required an 80% paycut in my salary. While my wife and I looked at each other and shrugged our shoulders, we had an idea that the earlier years of the decade weren't going to last. We also reallocated assets and cut expenses in unprecedented fashion.

Now I'm poised for that "better" opportunity. My wife and I have adjusted well to the recent recession, but I look forward to a new opportunity for the future.

A new goal I set for myself this learn how to play the piano. Will this gain me a better job or more pay? Likely not. But is learning the piano something I've wanted to do for bet!

You're a good man and provide a great outlet for friends of Simplicity!

Trevor Gay said...

Thank you for that perspective Scott and well done my friend – sounds like you took a pragmatic and sensible view when the 80% pay cut hit you! –WOW – well done for getting yourself ready for the upturn when it arrives.

Learning to play the piano would be terrific – I’ve always wanted to learn either piano or guitar – maybe I will try to do one of those in 2010 – thanks for the idea … and Happy New Year to you and your family my friend said...


Many studies have shown that picking up and learning an instrument will keep the mind alive during later stages of life.

I practiced with the band last night as we have a pretty big gig approaching. I play a few axes, and have for years, and enjoy live music. While my hearing won't benefit from the noise over time, my mind just might. Eddie Van Halen has credited tinnitus with success, in years, of his first marriage.

Cheers...and pick up an instrument to use that other half of the brain.

Trevor Gay said...

Thanks Scott - maybe a New Years resolution for me should be to learn to play an instrument :-)